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| Ha Ha Tonka State Park |
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| Buddies 4 Life |
Welcome back. It's been over 2 months since I said I'd post shortly after I posted pictures. Here I am now. Life changes and I think we all know this year has been shit, to say the least.
Well- it's November and I'm still in Osage Beach for now. I wasn't here last year this time of year so it has been nice to see the colors change. And it's the time of year where people are not watching for deer on the road during their mating season and unfortunately there are a lot of carcasses out there. I have learned my lesson from my CA experience to be hyper-vigilant although this doesn't transfer to other aspects of my driving. Speaking of- I nearly got a $750 dollar fine for speeding in a construction zones. Thankfully I got a warning from Officer Reno 911 and also hyper-vigilant in this area as well.
Ok, so A LOT has happened in this world since I wrote a post in May this year (aside from the pics of course). The world of healthcare has become more exhausting to put it lightly- nursing home healthcare during a pandemic is different than a hospital. We have lost SO MANY people this year- Covid and non-Covid and it breaks my heart. My love goes out to the nursing staff (including techs and CNAs) who have been by these folks' sides during their final moments and seen so much in a short amount of time.
This isolation has been a bitch on everyone- your 87 y/o grandma who you haven't seen since February is probably not the same person now. We are slowly opening things back up now that things are on the mend for us. Of course the threat is still out there. I am not going to get political on here at all but I will say this- to anyone who thinks the virus is not real or not as bad- maybe it isn't to most people, but it is detrimental to the elderly population. That's all about that.
Being a therapist under a highly demanding company (all therapy companies have struggled this year due to facility shut downs over Covid) has taken its toll on me. I feel like I am not the person I was when I started this job- can I blame all of that on work? no. But a significant portion yes. I feel like I am a shell of a human being- existing on cheese, Diet Coke, and sour patch kids (healthy- I know). I am grateful for the consistent hours when many have not had them so do not get me wrong there. I feel like I'm a hollow chocolate Easter Bunny (but like a good kind of chocolate, not that cheap crap) with no emotion left. I care about all my patients and work my ass off. I wear glasses now because those tiny iPads are hurting my eyes. I rarely wear makeup and feel like I have permanent purple baggage under my eyes. Naps are one of my greatest past-times. I feel like a pawn in this big ass game of chess with no checkmate in sight- just being checked myself to make sure I'm never feeling quite good about myself as a professional. That's just the tip of the iceberg really.
I am NOT asking for sympathy or comments. That is not my point. My point is that this year has been f*cking rough on ALL OF US everywhere with sometimes little empathy for the worker bees.
In conjunction with that- this year has changed me and many ways not for the better because of life and work strain. So if I haven't been in touch with you or seem not myself- I haven't been but I'm trying to find the ol' Lindsey gal again. she's in here somewhere.
I'm trying to make moves in the right direction and get ol' Lindsey back. I'm sure what's happening next but I'm working on it.
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| Yuva- my PT buddy |
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| 'Free t-shirt during a pandemic' day |
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| Sunset over School Buses |
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| When your roommate has a cat who is trying to teach you how to be a cat person. Dogs 4 Life. |
Thanks for reading,
don't worry- I'm fine.
Peace, love, and houseplants,
ME
